Are you a Victim of Circumstance or the Master Creator of all your experiences in life?

 

 

 

Hello all, this is something to consider if you are the creator of your experiences in life – all of them. The one’s you enjoy and the one’s you don’t. You are either the creator or a powerless victim with stories to tell others called gossip. It’s human and it’s ok, and there are more powerful ways to be especially if you are leading others.

 

“When our brains suggest that someone or some event is worth complaining about ask yourself, “why did I create this?”

 

The choice is simple – Ask the following – Can I control this? If the answer is no, it’s out of your control, instruct your brain to “let it go, I cannot control this.” Outside of our control is our customers decisions, traffic jams, election results, the weather, etc.

 

If the complaint or grievance is about a person, and we are telling others or just avoiding a difficult conversation, the “acorn brain, the little fucker,” is running you. What changes if you tell others, (gossip) or how can the person change if we don’t tell them? It can be difficult at first, and you can learn ways to bring up what doesn’t work for you about others.

 

“Hey, I may be wrong about something that is bothering me, and I want to discuss this so we can both understand each other better and I am glad to hear your side and change, ” is one suggestion. Find ways that work for you, remember to admit you may be off base or wrong.

 

The image above reflects what can happen if we aren’t brave enough to speak up. It does take some courage until you realize that it’s actually empathy that shares. Being willing to be vulnerable and speak about the complaint to the person who can do something about it. The key to saying what you tangibly know to be true for you is to let go of any outcome you want from the other person, just be open to listen. The iceberg couldn’t speak.  If someone comes to you to share a complaint, breathe and ask questions, don’t defend, imagine not knowing. It’s been fascinating to learn how things have changed when I changed.  I am very glad today that those people who shared didn’t let me sink.

Gratefully yours, Steve